FINAL APPROVAL!!!!!!

At 6:58 this morning my phone rang... I let out a shriek as I ran to pick it up. It was the call we have been waiting for- FINAL APPROVAL!!! We are now officially and legally the parents of Jonah RiYoon! There was a time when John and I thought we would never be parents and now we have two sons. I can't stop crying - so overwhelmed with joy and relief.

"The Lord has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy." Psalm126:3

I am so sorry to all those who have followed our journey and to my family and friends that keep up with us through this blog for having to take down blog posts and for not being able to post updates from Korea. Just prior to our first meeting with Jonah, we heard that officials may be monitoring social media and would not look favorably upon posting pictures or details about our adoption process so I needed to be cautious. Now that we are legally his parents I hope to be able to post some pictures and details about our trip.

Overall, we had a great trip. Joshua is a fabulous traveler. He did so well on both plane rides and touring around Korea. He also handled the meeting with his foster mom really well.

Our court date went great. We had the nicest judge. He told us we had approval at the end and that he thought we would be great parents for Jonah (almost made me cry). We still had to wait for the written preliminary approval, but it was such a relief to know we had approval. We are living proof that you can still get approval with a somewhat disruptive, not perfectly behaved child. Joshua only got a 20 minute nap and the court was running late, so by the time we got in there, he was not at his best! As soon as we got in, he loudly pronounced that he was hungry, wouldn't sit still, kept talking, etc, but the judge didn't even blink an eye over it.

The most difficult part was the meetings with Jonah. Our first meeting with Jonah was especially difficult; he was very shy with me and wouldn't interact with me at all. It was way beyond normal two year old stranger anxiety. It was obvious he knew something was up and he wanted no part of it whatsoever! Who could blame him. He was much more receptive to John though, which makes complete sense because he is closest to his foster mom. He and Joshua also did not get along very well. Our social worker visited him last February and we know from her description that the way he was acting was very out of character. It makes me sad that we didn't get to see his real personality prior to his world being completely turned upside down.

Our second meeting with Jonah was much better. He still overwhelmingly preferred John, but I did have a great moment with him taking turns blowing bubbles, I would blow some air, make a face, and he would just crack up. Made me so happy! I was just so grateful for this; he actually gave me eye contact and it just made me feel like eventually everything will be okay. The most challenging part was the two boys, they did not get along well at all. Let's just say that we are calling it a win, since there was no blood. In all seriousness though this will be one of the most challenging aspects of bringing Jonah home; the level of violence was way beyond brothers fighting as brothers do, so PLEASE don't tell me they are just fighting like brothers. Brothers may fight, but they still share love and a bond which Joshua and Jonah do not yet have. We would so appreciate your prayers for their relationship.

I will be heading back to Korea next week!

Blog posts

I made many of my prior blog posts drafts and will republish them when/if we receive court approval. I needed to take them down because they contained pictures of Jonah and could possibly be seen by officials in Korea.  I am sorry.

19 Months of Waiting....

...has almost come to an end! We leave VERY soon for Korea. We will meet Jonah on August 23rd in Korea (9pm Eastern, 6pm AZ time on August 22nd in the U.S.). Immediately following our meeting with Jonah, we will meet with Joshua's foster mother and possibly foster father. I am hoping he will be there; Joshua was very close to him and even though it may be difficult, I think it may be good for Joshua to see him.

Whether to visit with Joshua's foster family was a difficult decision. Many kids from Korea seem to enjoy looking at pictures of their foster family, but Joshua completely shutdown after coming home and did not want to look at them. He went through a period around 16 months home where he would finally look at their pictures and even hung them on the refrigerator, but that didn't last long. When I would ask Joshua if he wanted to visit them, he would tell me no. We have been praying about this and asking others to pray. We have seen God move in answer to prayer. Joshua has been talking about going to Korea, even telling his teacher he was going on "two airplanes" when she asked if he was going on an airplane to Korea. And when I asked him who we were going to visit, he told me, "Mrs. Choi" and seemed completely at peace about it.

We have also seen God moving in preparing Joshua's heart for having a brother. Prior to very recently, Joshua would answer no when asked if he wanted a brother. Now whenever we read a story that has a mommy animal and two babies, he says, "That's me, that's Jonah, and that's you." :-)

After our meetings, we will sight-see and hopefully have at least one other meeting with Jonah. We go to court on August 28th at 2:30pm (1:30 am Eastern, 10:30 pm AZ time). So pray for us before you go to bed on August 27th!

We would appreciate your prayers so much. We have already seen how God is working in answer to them. Please pray for:

• Safe, smooth travel and for Joshua to do well on the long flights
• Meetings with Jonah and his foster mom go well, able to ask questions and get answers that will help tell his story of his life in Korea
• Meeting with Joshua's foster family go well, no anxiety for Joshua, and for him to be open to them
• Fun time as a family in Korea seeing the sights
• Court appearance go well and that we would be able to satisfactorily answer the judges questions and receive quick approval
• Joshua be well behaved in Court!!!

I can't believe we will finally be in Korea meeting Jonah! Here he is receiving his 2nd birthday care package - love his little smile. Can't wait to meet my sweet boy!

We Have a Court Date!!!!!

We finally have a court date for Jonah. After EP approval, our paperwork was submitted immediately to the court. It only took them two weeks to assign us a court date. It is much further away than we had hoped, but at this point we are just happy to be moving forward.

We go to court on August 28th!!! That means we will fly to Korea some time the week prior because we need to be there 4-5 business days ahead of our court date to meet Jonah and give the Korean agency time to file some paperwork with the court.

We are finally going to get to meet our son!!!!!!

 By the time we meet him, we will have waited 19 months from the time that our acceptance paperwork was sent to Korea. Since both John and I need to appear in court, all three of us will travel to Korea for the first trip. Then we will all come home and I will go back 3-5 weeks later to bring Jonah home.

We applied for Joshua's passport a little later than we should have, though with enough time given the projected processing times. We were waiting because we were hoping to receive his certificate of citizenship in time to send it in with the application. We are still waiting on it, so in June we realized we needed to go ahead and apply for the passport without it since it is not technically required (just makes it easier). Please pray we quickly receive Joshua's passport with no delays.

Also, please be praying that God prepares all of our hearts for Jonah and his heart for us. Jonah will have lived with his foster family for two years by the time we get to bring him home. Pray also that Joshua's heart is ready to be in Korea again and visit his foster family.

EP Approved!!!

We got news yesterday morning that the Korean government has approved Jonah's EP!! Now we just have to wait for our paperwork to be submitted to the court and be assigned a court date. My best guess at this point for a court date is August, which would mean Jonah would be home by September. This will be almost exactly two years after Joshua came home; we celebrate our second Family Day with Joshua on September 2nd.

And then today we got the BEST pictures of Jonah ever. I could die over the cuteness of his sunglasses and popped collar!

So much to be thankful for today!

Submitted for EP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Finally some good news to report on the adoption front! I got an early morning phone call from our agency today to tell me that our paperwork has been submitted to the Korean government for their approval, which is called Emigration Permission (EP). This is a huge step, this is what we have been waiting for for the past 16 months.

We thought we would be submitted last week and when that didn't happen it was very disappointing. I was at that point when you just throw your hands up and say, "okay, God, I can't worry about it anymore." It will happen when it happens. Apparently, small groups are being submitted rather than one huge batch as is usually the case and we just didn't make it into last week's group. For my fellow APs who timeline stalk, our acceptance to Korea (ATK) date was 1/18/2012. But if you are a timeline stalker you seriously need to join the Eastern Facebook group. :)

It's interesting, we were also submitted for Joshua's EP in May. And then we began the long wait through the summer waiting for EP approval which took an unprecedented 13 weeks (at the time). I have no idea how long it will take for Jonah's EP. In addition, to EP there is an additional step now so after EP, our paperwork will be submitted to the Family Court and then we will be given a court date. My best guess at this point for travel is September or October, but really we have no idea. After everything that has happened, I am just praying, "Please God let him come home this year."

We also got some new pictures yesterday. Jonah is getting so tall. He is currently 24 pounds and 34 inches tall. The first three are from March (20 months old), the second three are from April, and the last four are from May (22 months old).

"Done in"

This is how we are feeling regarding the adoption process right now, completely done in. John and I are both feeling so very weary of this process, to the point that we don't think we can ever do it again. We are tired of the emotional roller coaster, the uncertainty, the waiting, the lack of forward movement (for anyone, not just us). I am tired of the constant search for any shred of information that might shed light on why this process has come to a halt and when it might start moving again. And most of all I am tired of watching our son grow up in pictures, and yet I am can't stop checking my email for new pictures. Jonah turned 22 months old yesterday. With almost one hundred percent certainty we can now say that we will miss his second birthday, something I could not have even fathomed at the beginning of this year.  We have been waiting almost 16 months to bring him home. By comparison, we waited 11 months after referral acceptance for Joshua.

Since my last post, the emotional roller coaster has continued. At the end of March, we found out that Jonah's birth mom was contacted to confirm relinquishment. I wrote about this here. This news was definitely bittersweet. We felt relief that we would be able to move forward with his adoption, but also great sadness because I would never wish or pray for a child to lose their mother. We heard from other adoptive families that a court official was present during the interview to ensure that relinquishment was really what she wanted and that there was no coercion. We were also asked to provide more paperwork at this time and were told we would be submitted for Emigration Permission (EP) soon. The month of April came and went with no EP news and no Family Court approvals. There were several families that were given April court dates, but they were canceled after the court decided we didn't need to appear in court.

Near the end of April, the courts changed their minds and summoned several families to appear in court at the end of May. But there was still no word on EP submission for us. Then on May 1st, we heard that the EP quota for 2013 had finally been released and we were told once again that we would be submitted for EP "soon," supposedly at the beginning of this month. All week I have been hoping to hear the news that our paperwork has been submitted, but it has not come.

In the meantime, the Family Court in Korea has decided that all families, both husband and wife, must appear in court. So we are right back where we started at the beginning of March. We are happy to appear in court and answer any questions; we just want this process to move forward. While we do still have concerns about how this is going to work out and the unexpected financial costs, the greatest stressor has been been removed because unlike before when both parents would be required to stay in country for 3-4 weeks, it appears that 2 shorter trips will be now be allowed or one parent could leave after the court appearance and the other stay. We do still have concerns about bringing Joshua back, but with the delays he will have been home for about 2 years before we bring Jonah home so I think he will be more ready to go back to Korea for a visit. Logistically, we still don't know how this is all going to work out. The first families (waiting since December 2011) now have court dates ranging from the end of May through mid-June. Hopefully, we will learn more once these families go through the process.

Yes, I know Jonah will be worth the wait. Yes, I know God's timing is perfect, but it doesn't make this process less difficult. It has taken a toll on me emotionally and physically. I have gained weight. I have been overwhelmed and at times even a little depressed. I feel like I haven't been there for some of my friends who are also going through struggles. I feel like I have been a terrible friend, aunt, sister, daughter, terrible in pretty much any other role I have other than my immediate roles as wife and mom.

As always, prayers are so appreciated, for the process, for Jonah, and for us.