Losing Johannah also meant the return of infertility. This is the other reason I like the name "Day by Day." When I think about infertility and the possibility that it will never end, it is overwhelming. But when I think about enduring infertility just for today, it is so much more manageable. The thing is I have no idea how long infertility is going to last, things could change tomorrow. All I need to do is look to the Lord trusting and obeying Him each day. When I do so, He provides me with "strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow" (from the hymn "Great is thy Faithfulness).
One of the other things I really struggle with is wanting the Lord to give me a detailed road map of where I am heading. I want to know the outcome. In my ladies Bible study, I have been studying "Experiencing God" by Henry Blackaby. One of the points Blackaby made that really hit home with me was this one:
We say, "Lord, if You could just tell me where I am heading, then I will be able to set my course and go." He says, "You don't need to. You need to follow Me one day at a time." This response comes only from those who have learned to walk closely with God and to trust Him to care for the details of their lives.... Who really knows the way for you to go to fulfill God's purpose for your life? Who knows how you can experience abundant life? God. Jesus said, "I am the way."
By nature, I am a worrier and I like to be in control. But that is not how the Lord want me to live. He wants me to trust Him, to put my hand in His and follow Him step by step, one day at a time, wherever He leads me.
After I came up with "Day by Day," I wondered if there were any Scriptures that used that term. I found 2 Cor 4:16-18,
"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."
I love this Scripture. It says exactly what the Lord has been teaching me, which is to fix my eyes on Him and have an eternal focus. As painful as infertility is, it is a "light and momentary trouble" when viewed from the perspective of eternity.
Then I googled "day by day" and came across a hymn written by Lina Sandell. It was written not long after she watched her father drown after being thrown overboard after the ship they were traveling on suddenly lurched. Here are the lyrics:
- Day by day, and with each passing moment,
Strength I find to meet my trials here;
Trusting in my Father's wise bestowment,
I've no cause for worry or for fear.
He, whose heart is kind beyond all measure,
Gives unto each day what He deems best,
Lovingly its part of pain and pleasure,
Mingling toil with peace and rest.
- Every day the Lord Himself is near me,
With a special mercy for each hour;
All my cares He fain would bear and cheer me,
He whose name is Counsellor and Pow'r.
The protection of His child and treasure
Is a charge that on Himself He laid;
"As thy days, thy strength shall be in measure,"
This the pledge to me He made.
- Help me then, in every tribulation,
So to trust Thy promises, O Lord,
That I lose not faith's sweet consolation,
Offered me within Thy holy Word.
Help me, Lord, when toil and trouble meeting,
E'er to take, as from a father's hand,
One by one, the days, the moments fleeting,
Till with Christ the Lord I stand.