Adoption #2 Update

After being asked a couple of times recently if there were any updates on Jonah's adoption, I realized I am long overdue in giving an update. As you can see by the ticker on the right side of my blog, we have now been waiting almost 10 months from the time our referral acceptance paperwork went to Korea (ATK). Initially, we were anticipating an 18 month wait to bring Jonah home, but as the process began to move forward it began to look like he could be home by February of 2013. Now I am not so sure.

Many of you may remember that we were waiting on Emigration Permission (EP) from the Korean government in order to bring Joshua home. We have been waiting on the same thing for Jonah. Once the EP quota was announced at the beginning of this year, we knew we would not travel this year to bring Jonah home. But it was looking like we would be in the first group submitted in 2013, which is when we began to anticipate traveling in February. However, a new law in Korea went in to effect on August 5th of this year. This law mainly changed things with domestic adoption in Korea, however it does have some effect on international adoption, the main effect being that after we receive EP approval we now have to get approval from the Korean court. At this point it looks like only our paperwork goes to court; we don't have to personally appear in court and our adoption will not be finalized in Korea just as before. In anticipation of the new law the Korean government allowed the adoption agencies in Korea to submit large groups of families for EP approval prior to the new law going into effect. Only 10% of the 2012 families were not submitted under the old law; these families are to be the trial group under the new law. The problem is only a few of them have been submitted for EP, none have received approval, and not one international adoptive family has gone through the Korean courts yet.

The recent MPAK blog post sheds more light on all this. The problem appears to be with the courts and with the Ministry that handles adoption. No one knows yet if the court is going to require additional paperwork or information from us. But irregardless, it looks like the remaining 10% of families will not all travel this year which pushes us all back. Even if all these families receive EP, it is being estimated that it could take another couple of months after that to receive court approval.

So where does that leave us? Traveling in May? I honestly have no idea. This new information has had me feeling pretty down and discouraged. I feel like Jonah is going to be two years old before he is home. Missing two years of his life - a hard pill to swallow right now.

But I have to trust God with this. It is all so out of my control. I know His timing is perfect. It was with Joshua, and it will be again with Jonah. I have to rest in that and do the only thing I can - pray.

Why Now Lord?

I have to confess a struggle I was having after getting the news about EP submission for Joshua. It may not make sense to a lot of people and at the same time I know there are many people who would trade places with me in a heartbeat (especially after all of the devastating news for ESWS and SWS families that has come recently), but I have always tried to be honest and transparent on this blog. So here goes. The truth is after the initial elation, I struggled with "why now Lord?" Why Lord did you make me wait over 6 years to become a mom, and at the one time where I would have hit the 'pause' button, you hit the 'fast forward' button?

I have said that we will travel in July, but the truth is we could travel in June. We just don't know. And it was the thought of June travel that had me freaking out a bit. I kept envisioning us bringing Joshua home to a hotel room after we get our travel call. And I was struggling with a lot of guilt about that. We are taking him from a stable home where he is loved and cared for, and I just really want us to be settled in when we get the call to travel.

Ultimately, I guess what I was really struggling with was laying down my idea of how things were supposed to go, at least according to my plan.

"Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails." Proverbs 19:21

But obviously the Lord has a different plan, one that requires me to let go of my perfectionism. You see according to my plan, we are supposed to be moved into our house, everything was supposed to be unpacked, the house was supposed to be decorated, and then I would have plenty of time to research and plan our trip to Korea and learn a bit more of the language. And frankly, this still sounds like the best plan to me.

But I don't know everything. And God does. I may not understand why this is the perfect timing, but God does. And so I have to trust. I have to trust that even if things don't happen according to my idea of perfection (and most likely they won't), it will be okay.

I went back to a post I wrote a little while ago on fear, and found this:

We don't just trust God to let us avoid what we fear most. We determine to trust Him no matter what, even if our worst nightmare befalls us (picking up our son is something I am incredibly excited about and grateful for, so please understand my struggle was with the timing).

"If ____, then God will take care of me."

"If ____, then God has a plan."

"If ____, then God desires to accomplish something monumental in me."

"If ___, then Gods going to demonstrate His sufficiency to me."

If we get our travel call in June, then God will take care of me (and Joshua).

If  we get our travel call in June, then God has a plan.

If  we get our travel call in June, then God desires to accomplish something monumental in me.

If we get our travel call in June,  then Gods going to demonstrate His sufficiency to me.

I also went back to my "statement of trust" that is on the top right of my blog, particularly the part from Isaiah 26:8, "Yes, LORD, walking in the way of your laws, we wait for you; your name and renown are the desire of our hearts."

I want the Lord to be glorified through what He brings about in our life. I want things to happen according to His will and timing. And so I pray as Jesus did, "Father, glorify your name!" John 12:28.

What matters is that Joshua will be coming home to us. The rest of it really isn't that important.

Thank you Lord for your perfect timing.

Devastating News for ESWS Families

On Friday our agency (which is partnered with ESWS in Korea) finally received and announced the news regarding the 2011 quota issued by the Korean government. Here are the highlights of the info we were given:

• The quota is 10% lower than it was last year.   

• ESWS has already begun slowing down the number of referrals they distribute to US agencies despite the fact that there are many hundreds of children in care.  This is to ensure, going forward long-term, that eventually the wait to travel will decrease.  This change, however, will not have an effect on families currently with matches or even those matched within the next year.  

• Accordingly, the new WAIT TO TRAVEL for any ESWS family matched and whose paperwork went to ESWS after December 1, 2010, is now up to 14 months.  ESWS anticipates that if December families cannot travel in 2011, they will be processed through the Ministry right away in January of 2012 along with January 2011 (acceptance paperwork to Korea) families and then be able to travel in February of 2012. 

Up to 14 months waiting for your child to come home - this is AFTER being matched and officially accepting (paperwork is sent to Korea) a referral for a child. It is just devastating news and I have been so sad for all those affected. I remember well when we were on the receiving end of such news. I am not sure how many readers I have that have been affected, but please leave me a comment if I can be praying for you.

I am also incredibly sad for the 100's of children in care who may never have forever families due to the decrease in referrals. It is my hope and prayer that the Church in Korea will rise above the stigma of adoption and begin welcoming these children into their families.

With an October ATK (acceptance to Korea), we will travel this year. However, I am unsure of whether our wait time is going to increase. Last year the cutoff to travel was April 1st; those families accepting in April didn't travel until February of this year. But rather than submitting the maximum number of EPs for approval at a time, ESWS spread out EP submissions throughout the rest of 2010 so that the last travel call occurred in December. We are up to August 2010 ATKs for EP submissions (they are waiting for approval). That only leaves September, October, and November ATKs remaining for travel in 2011. If they try to spread us out throughout the rest of 2011, there is simply no way for there not to be an increase in the projected "up to 11 months" wait time. I am taking a wait and see approach. There were a lot of acceptances in September 2010. If at the next EP submission, ESWS breaks the month up into smaller groups for submission, that will be a pretty good indicator of what they intend to do. I am hoping they break with past patterns and allow us all to travel, even if it means there are no families traveling in November or December.

I know the Lord's timing is perfect and so I am resting in that knowledge. It is all out of my control - we will travel when we travel.

WE ARE APPROVED!!!

Thank you all for your prayers! Today went great! We each had our interviews, mostly covering our childhoods, families, parents, our marriage, and health and then we gave her a tour of our house. We were both so nervous.

I thought we would have to wait to hear whether we were approved, but at the end she was able to tell us that pending successful contact with our references to verify that they wrote our reference letters and continue to support our adoption, we are approved. We should go on the wait list by April 1st and from there total time until travel to Korea should be between 9 and 15 months. We do have one issue. As of April 1st, we only have 14 months until we get stationed somewhere else. Our social worker is checking with the Korea program coordinator in Minnesota to see what our options are. Korea only allows their children to be adopted in certain states in the U.S. We are hoping that we can get prior approval to be allowed to adopt regardless of where we go, or possibly get permission to adopt as long as we go to a state they approve of, and then John can request to be stationed in one of those states (which the Air Force may or may not choose to honor). The other possible option is for me to stay behind for a few months until we can finalize our adoption, assuming we have already traveled to Korea and just need to do our 3 post-placement visits over the first 6 months. Back in October, we were told that as long as we were stationed stateside it would be okay. But Korea has recently become more restrictive about families moving during the adoption process. I am putting it all in the Lord's hands, trusting Him to work out all the details and timing. It is really not in my control.

I got to call my mom at work tonight and tell her we are approved, which was really exciting. She is really excited about having a new grandbaby. Hard to believe, I am going to be a mom in 9-15 months. It is hard for me to even write "I am" rather than "I may." It doesn't feel real yet.

If Not for Infertility.....

I mentioned in my last post that my excitement had returned, but it was actually not finding out our interview was coming up that brought it about. It was a response I received by email from a blog reader who is an adoptive mother and the encouraging comments after I wrote The Sorrow in my Heart and A Painful Realization.

It was also several blog posts I came across at that time. I would highly encourage you to check them out, especially if you are contemplating adoption. I think you will be blessed. This is in no way an attempt to "push" adoption on anyone. I only want to share how blessed I have been over these last couple of weeks.

Elaine at God's Faithfulness through Infertility posted Healed Heart shortly after I wrote "A Painful Realization" and I felt God speaking directly to me through it. Several days later she wrote Did all that really happen? and expressed how her daughter was so worth the pain of infertility and how unfathomably heartbreaking it would be for her if Little Bug was not her daughter.

"Just Believing" wrote about how her heart is overflowing with all that God has done in her family and how at peace she is with the possibility of never experiencing pregnancy.

Jennifer at Thought from a Blonde wrote about her friends who have adopted. She wrote, "I can look at their family and know how perfect she is for their family. Without infertility that our dear friends struggled with, this precious child would not be in theirs" and "If this couple would have conceived a child they would not be parents to these four children. How could they not be a part of their family?"

In the emails I received from an adoptive mother of several children, I was particularly encouraged by several things. It was so encouraging to me because she is really speaking from the "other side," having never experienced pregnancy and now several years down the road on the journey. I share this with her permission:

"Just wanted you to know that for me the sorrow has gone away - in fact it seems odd to even use that word now."

"I must say, the wait to become a parent was probably the most trying of anything I have experienced so far. I can honestly say it was worth every minute though."

"As far as pregnancy goes for me, I don't know that I would say that I am glad that I was never able to experience that. However, if I would have we would not have the family that we do now and I, of course, would never trade our family for anything."

"I just want to keep encouraging you, though, that it is possible to get through this and to be able to look back and smile. We may not ever fully understand it all on earth, but God knows exactly what He is doing and I am sure when we see the full picture in heaven some day we will be in awe of his wisdom, grace, and love."

"I think it is easy for people to get discouraged if some adoption processes have a lot shorter waiting period than others."

"It is incredible to think how God specifically put our family together and we will take His timing over ours any day!! We tell our kids that before the world was even made God knew that our family would be together."

The common message I take from all of these lovely ladies is that, "If not for infertility...." they would not have their children and that would truly be heartbreaking.

I am once again resting in His plan.

First Adoption Interview Next Week

I got an email today from our adoption agency! We have been assigned our social worker. It turns out the gal we have been working with to get all our paperwork done is also doing her internship for her Masters in Social Work and she has been assigned to us. I am pretty excited by this since we already know her and have a rapport with her. Plus, she is really nice :)

We will have 2 visits with her, one in her office and one in our home. The first visit should be next week at 9 AM. She said it will last 2-3 hours. I think we will each be interviewed separately and then jointly.

This process has definitely taken longer than I thought it would. All this waiting with no moving forward has been really difficult. But I know it has been for the best because it has enabled me to experience a time of healing and preparation.

My excitement has definitely returned!

Please pray for us regarding next week's interview. Please pray for us to have the right words and for us not to be too nervous.

I was thinking tonight about how blessed I am to be a part of this blogging community. I don't know what I would do without all of you!

"Timely" Sarah's Laughter

Yesterday's Daily Double Portion from Sarah's Laughter was very "timely." It was short so I will post it for those of you that have not yet signed up to receive them.

A Broken Clock

Be still, and know that I am God;Psalm 46:10

In my office, it is always 5:30. Never 2:15. Never 8:04. It is always 5:30.
There is a broken clock in my office. People have such different reactions to it! Some look at it with a quizzical look on their faces. Others offer to fix it for us, but I always politely decline. You see, my clock is broken on purpose. I took a perfectly good, functioning clock, broke it and hung it on my wall. What a huge blessing!
You see, that broken clock is a reminder of the perfection of God’s timing. At first glance, it appears that the broken clock is worthless. The hands never move. It looks like nothing good is happening. But glance down at the bottom of the clock. The pendulum is still moving. Swinging left. Swinging right. The pendulum never stops.
In the dark days of waiting through your struggle with infertility, it feels like God’s plan for your family has ground to a halt. No explanations from the medical community. No prophetic utterances promising that long-sought after child. Even in the silence of infertility, listen to the ticking of a broken clock. God, like that pendulum, is still working and moving. When it seems like nothing is happening, the pendulum of God’s timing is still swinging. Buy a clock, break it and proudly hang it on your wall. Let it serve as a reminder of the perfection of God’s timing.

"God, like that pendulum, is still working and moving. When it seems like nothing is happening, the pendulum of God’s timing is still swinging." I needed this today. This is exactly what I have been feeling lately, like things have ground to halt. We are in this "between" place right now. We are done with fertility treatment, but not yet approved for adoption. I guess I am not able to take it as a foregone conclusion that we will be approved. I can't think of why we wouldn't be, but you just never know. Right now it feels like nothing is happening. We are in limbo, waiting on ONE form. But God is still working. I may not be able to see it or feel it, but that doesn't change the facts. He is God Almighty and He is at work.

In a Holding Pattern

I had a great weekend in Florida visiting my family. The highlight of course was the chance to love on my niece and nephews. I went to the zoo, had a sleepover, and got my hair done by my niece. Let's hope she never learns how to get photos off her cell phone :)

Unfortunately, I came back and immediately came down with a cold. Hence my lack of blogging last week. I am now on the mend.

I also had lots of homework to catch up on this past weekend for my Perspectives course . I am loving it, a complete shift in my thinking is taking place. It really gives you a more global vision of God's purpose in the world. But I must say the reading and homework is kicking my behind! It is a lot of work.

No news on our adoption home study. We are still waiting for one form, a child abuse clearance, from the state of Maryland. When I contacted our agency, they said it was now taking 8.5 weeks for the form to come back which means it may not arrive until the end of January. They won't assign us a social worker and precede with the rest of the home study until this form arrives. So we are in a holding pattern. I was feeling pretty anxious about this delay initially, as I envisioned all kinds of scenarios and problems coming up resulting in us not getting approved. Thank God for my hubby who patiently reassures me of how unfounded my fears are. Recently, the Lord has given me a peace about this delay. I don't know the reason for the delay, but perhaps there is a reason for it that will become clear as His perfect plan unfolds in His perfect time.

It is really difficult to know what will happen as far as the designated situation I wrote about in this post. We are still pursuing it, but I am not sure how this delay is going to affect things. C has not yet relinquished her parental rights; from what I understand she is waiting for us to get approved. But I can't exactly wish for her to do so. I wish for her to be able to parent, for Y not to have to go through the loss of her mother. Currently, Y is in a government facility for children of low income mothers which was described to me as an around the clock daycare. To me it sounded like an orphanage which broke my heart thinking about Y in that place. I think the only difference from an orphanage is that C still has legals rights and she can go and pick Y up and take her home. She just can't pick her up and drop her off; she either has to take her home or leave her there. She can visit Y at the facility though. I really don't know what it is best in this situation. I pray continually for Y and C. I ask God to protect Y emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually and give C strength. Y will be 2 in March so she is at an age when transitions and loss are especially difficult. I ask God to help C to parent and find the resources she needs to enable her to care for Y. But it may not be possible, C is very young and life is extremely difficult for North Korean refugee women. She also has significant health problems. If Y is the child the Lord has chosen for us because C is not able to parent her, then we will receive her as a precious gift from the Lord. All I can do is wait. And pray.

Psalm 127 - Part 2

If you are familiar with Psalm 127, you may know what comes after the verse I quoted in my previous post.

"Sons are a heritage from the LORD, children a reward from Him. Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are sons born in one's youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them." Psalm 127: 3-5

These verses have troubled me throughout my struggle with infertility. I could never wrap my head around them. I have thought about them a great deal, especially recently. I asked the Lord to please give me insight into them and help me to understand.

"...children a reward from Him" I have struggled most with this part. Children are a reward it says. So am I being punished? If I had led a better life, been more righteous, more deserving would I have children? I have been taught that you must interpret scripture with scripture. Do any of us "deserve" children? No. God's word is clear: "all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God" Romans 3:23 and the "wages of sin is death" Romans 6:23. Elsewhere it says, "all of us have become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags" Isaiah 64:6 and "God looks down from heaven on the sons of men to see if there are any who understand, any who seek God. Everyone has turned away, they have together become corrupt; there is no one who does good, not even one." Psalm 53:3. There is no one worthy, no one who is righteous on their own, no one who "deserves" anything other than death from God. If it was up to us to be worthy of having children, no one would have any. Our righteousness is from Christ. In Him, I am found "not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ - the righteousness that comes through God and is by faith" Phil 3:9 So I can't earn God's reward, favor, or blessing. It is God's grace. "Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights" James 1:17. The Lord causes "his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and unrighteous" Matthew 5:45. We don't do anything to deserve it or not deserve it. The account of Zechariah and Elizabeth even more clearly speaks to this. It says, "Both of them were upright in the sight of God, observing all the Lord's commandments and regulations blamelessly. But they had no children, because Elizabeth was barren; and they were both well along in years" Luke 1:6-7. They were "blameless" and yet they were not rewarded, experiencing years of barrenness. But as many of you know that is not the end of their story. In time, Elizabeth did become pregnant and gave birth to the forerunner of our Messiah. They were direct participants in a miracle, in their own personal lives and in God's plan for the world. As I thought about this, it finally hit me. It is about timing. God's perfect timing. Right now I wonder why I am not receiving this "reward," gift, blessing, whatever you want to call it. I wonder if I am being punished, and believe me, I have done much to warrant that punishment. But when I look at the whole story, I don't question why Elizabeth was barren or think she was less rewarded or blessed. In fact, I think she was incredibly blessed by her years of waiting. God knit together a miracle in her womb - John the Baptist - who prepared the way for Jesus as he went throughout the land preaching repentance. As I look at other accounts of infertility in the Bible, do I think Sarah, Rebekah, Rachel, or Hannah were less blessed, less rewarded. No I do not. Each of them experienced years of barrenness and each of them saw God perform a miracle in their lives. They knew it was God, everyone else knew it was God, and He received all the glory. But it happened in God's way and timing. Perhaps they too questioned why God was withholding this blessing from their lives. But in time, God's perfect plan was revealed and they witnessed God doing a mighty work in their lives. They received their heritage from the Lord.

We can only do as Hannah did, "I was pouring out my soul to the LORD" 1 Sam 1:15 and continue to pour our hearts out to God, depending on Him to build our houses and give us the gift of children.

Psalm 127 - Part 1

You may have noticed the new verse at the top right of my blog. "Unless the LORD builds the house, its builders labor in vain." I have always loved this verse and have wanted to get it on a plaque to place in our home. It represents my belief that the Lord is the only One who can build our house. I believe He placed John and I together in marriage and I believe it is up to Him to add to our family. It is very easy for me to fall into sin and try to depend upon myself rather than the Lord. Infertility has shown me my need to depend on the Lord, for strength to face the trial of infertility and to bring a child into our family. Time has not made this trial any easier. But it has grown me in compassion, love, humility, and trust in the Lord. Daily, I find myself taking my desire to the LORD, surrendering it to Him anew, and asking Him to fulfill it. Every pregnancy announcement, every pregnant belly, every child I see that brings this pain back to my heart and mind is an opportunity to once again take it to the Lord. He is the only one who can do anything about it. He is the creator of all life. He alone knows the child(ren) He has chosen for John and I to parent. Of course, the question most of us can barely stand to even think comes up - what if God doesn't plan for us to have a child and intends for us to live child-free? This has been a great fear of mine since the beginning of this journey. I can't pretend to know God's plans and thoughts on this, but I personally believe child-free living is not God's will for most of us. I believe if God calls us to such a life it is for a specific purpose and He will give us the peace and even joy to live it. Why don't I think it is God's will for most of us? Because of His Word. This is all I have to go on. There are many instances of infertility in the Bible and in every one of them in His perfect timing and way, God brought a child. In each of these cases it was through pregnancy, but I believe God also answers our prayers through adoption. Throughout the Bible, God's heart for the fatherless is clear (Deut 10:18, Psalm 68:5, and Psalm 82:3 just to name a few places). In verse 6 of Psalm 68, it says the Lord sets the lonely in families. Psalm 113:9 says the Lord "settles the barren woman in her home as a happy mother of children." I have always been hesitant to believe and trust that the Lord will bless us with children, but the other day (September 9 I think) I made a conscious decision. I was walking through the parking garage on my way into work crying out to God, asking for His grace for the day, and once again bringing my desire for children to Him, and I decided then and there that I was going to believe God is who He says He is. His word says He has a heart for the fatherless and commands us to have one as well, it says He settles the lonely in families, and it says He settles the barren woman in her home as a happy mother of children. This is who God says He is and I choose to believe Him.

Going with Bethany

Just a quick update on our adoption process - it looks like we are going to go with Bethany Christian Services. In many ways it doesn't make sense for us to go with Bethany given the time line and wait time, but we sense God leading us in this direction despite these things. Every time I start thinking about going in another direction, I have no peace about it and I find the Lord points me back to Bethany. Initially, as I prayed about what we should do the only answer I got was "wait." At that point I was wondering if we were even supposed to be moving forward with adoption. But I think this was the Lord preparing me for how He was going to lead. At that point I was not yet ready to surrender to a longer time period. But as I continued to hear "wait," I began to surrender to God's timing and became willing to wait upon Him. I believe His ways and timing are perfect. He is our all-knowing, loving, faithful Father and we can trust in the plans He has for us. As I continued to pray about it, I sensed a pull toward Bethany and a peace about it. I then talked it over with John who told me that he had also been praying about it and felt led toward Bethany. I believe this time can be a time of preparation. I have really enjoyed learning about adoption over this last month or so, but I still have much more to learn. Based on what I have learned so far, I am confident I want an open adoption. I am actually surprised at how passionate I am about this.

In other news, I am a little behind on my blog reading and commenting. I am hoping I can catch up soon so my apologies for my lack of support recently. Between work, being out of town, my new exercise classes, and it being the week before my period I have just been exhausted. Even after all this time, it is still such a hard time of the month. I still find myself hoping.

At the Appointed Time

In my Tuesday night small group Bible study we are currently studying the book of Acts. I came across something in the 3rd chapter that was very meaningful to me:

¹One day Peter and John were going up to the temple at the time of prayer—at three in the afternoon. ²Now a man crippled from birth was being carried to the temple gate called Beautiful, where he was put every day to beg from those going into the temple courts. ³When he saw Peter and John about to enter, he asked them for money. ⁴Peter looked straight at him, as did John. Then Peter said, "Look at us!" ⁵So the man gave them his attention, expecting to get something from them.

⁶Then Peter said, "Silver or gold I do not have, but what I have I give you. In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, walk." ⁷Taking him by the right hand, he helped him up, and instantly the man's feet and ankles became strong. ⁸He jumped to his feet and began to walk. Then he went with them into the temple courts, walking and jumping, and praising God. ⁹When all the people saw him walking and praising God, ¹⁰they recognized him as the same man who used to sit begging at the temple gate called Beautiful, and they were filled with wonder and amazement at what had happened to him. Acts 3: 1-10

It says that this man was put at the temple gate every day. It says he was crippled from birth and later in chapter 4, it says that the man was over 40 years old when he was miraculously healed. My study Bible says the gate called Beautiful was a favorite entrance to the temple court. So this is what hit me in this passage. If this man was put there every day, there is a pretty good chance that Jesus saw this man during His time on earth. And yet Jesus chose not to heal him at that time. Why? Because at the appointed time, Jesus chose to heal this man through Peter and John. And what was the result? All who recognized the man were "filled with wonder and amazement at what had happened to him" (v. 10). The healing of this man at this time provided the opportunity for Peter and John to address a crowd of onlookers and later the Sanhedrin. As a result, the number of believers grew from the 3,000 at Pentecost to 5,000 (Acts 4:4). The Sanhedrin wanted to punish Peter and John but could not decide how to do so because "all the people were praising God for what had happened" (Acts 4:21). God was glorified in the healing of this man through Peter and John at this time. God's timing is always perfect.

Is this cycle the appointed time for us? I don't know, all I know is that the Lord has said, "This is the way; walk in it" Isaiah 30:21. My prayer is for God to be glorified. I will not lean on my understanding or try to guess how God will work things out. I will wait upon the Lord to reveal His perfect plan in His perfect time.