Friday, May 7, 2010

"Waiting Time" not "Wasted Time"

Since getting the unexpected news that we will be waiting longer to adopt from Korea than we originally expected, I have been thinking a lot about how I want to use this time. I knew almost immediately after getting the news that I had to use this time in a positive way. I could choose to sit around and wallow in my sorrows or I could do some things I have always wanted to do. I don't want this "waiting time" to be "wasted time." I have to live the life I have, not put my life on hold until I have the life I want. And so I began to think about some things I would like to do.

The first thing on my list is to take an official and very long overdue honeymoon with my husband. He was in school when we got married, taking one of the prerequisites for his nursing degree, so we only got to have a long weekend away. After he was done with nursing school, he joined the Air Force, and then we were geographically separated for 15 months, and then infertility. We have had lots of weekends away by ourselves and other trips to visit family, but we have never gone on a week long trip with just the two of us. I feel like this is our last shot to take a real honeymoon. I should have enough leave saved up by December so the plan is take a trip over John's Christmas break. Location to be decided. I am definitely open for suggestions.

The second thing on my list is visiting my friend Wendi in Turkey. Her husband is a physician in the clinic where John was a nurse when we were stationed at Eglin. We initially bonded over our shared struggle with infertility, but she quickly became one of my closest friends. She has been such an amazing friend to me, always giving support and encouragement just when I need it. She and her husband, along with their two little miracles, are being assigned to Incirlik Air Base in Turkey this summer. Even before getting the news about the adoption delay, we had talked about having a "kill the time until the little one comes party" in Turkey. But I was wondering how it would work out time wise because "the call" to travel to Korea could have come when I was there. Now that won't be an issue. I am planning on leaving my job 2-3 months before we move to our next assignment, which will be next spring. So the plan is to go at that time. I can't wait! I have actually never traveled outside of the U.S.

The next thing on my list (and I promise this is the last travel related one!) is to go on a short term mission trip. I am praying for God's leading on this one. My heart has been touched by God for East Asia, but I am open to whatever opportunity He presents.

I mentioned that I had an information meeting last night in my previous post. It was for The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society Team in Training. I am going to be training to run a half marathon! And of course also raising funds and supporting The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. I have never said a lot about this before on my blog, but in early 2008, my family received the devastating news that my sister had Hodgkin's Lymphoma. I called her last night to tell her about this before telling anyone else. I could tell she was really excited about it and it meant a lot to her. She is now over 18 months cancer free, praise God! Training for a marathon has been something I have wanted to do for a very long time. So after last week, I said why not now. And why not do it and at the same time raise money for a disease that has touched my family and so many others. I am starting with a half marathon and hopefully I can work up to a marathon and a triathlon later. I am going the run the Rock 'n' Roll Virginia Beach half marathon (13.1 miles) on September 5th. The kick off event is next Saturday morning and then training starts after that. I am going to try and start pre-training this week. Believe me, I need it. I have been so sporadic in my exercising since starting back to work.

Other things on my list are to go horseback riding, which I haven't done since I was a child and take advantage of all Washington, DC has to offer as far as museums and shows. I really want to go see a show or concert at Wolftrap.

Tomorrow John and I are heading to Richmond for an overnight trip. This is partly to give us a chance to reconnect after his very difficult school semester and partly to celebrate our "family of two" (love this Stacey) instead of dwelling on what we don't have. We try to plan something fun to do together on Mother's Day because it is such a difficult time of year for me.

I hope you all have a great weekend! I am praying for you my friends. For those of you celebrating your first Mother's Day as a mom, I hope it is a joyous celebration for you!


Flakymn said...

I love this list Becky. Honestly, truly, this is something you will always be glad you did. It's the one thing I wish I was "mature" enough to have done ... and I am so glad I am on your list!!!

Anonymous said...

I think that's great that you are doing all of those things and making plans. Way to see the positive in the waiting. I have also been thinking about my so called 2 year "Adoption Bucket List", all the things I want to do before a child is added to our family. I'm so glad we got a puppy, that is a experience that would not have been the same as married couple without kids. By the way, have you heard of "Little Seoul Blog" for Korean culture and fun stuff, I found it from someone's blog, can't remember who?

Anonymous said...

The Little Seouls' Blog link is

A said...

What awesome plans for this time in your life! As a (former?) runner of 2 marathons and a handful of half's, I am totally psyched that you signed up for the half in VA beach! I never did that one, but I hear it is awesome!

Thank you so much for your prayers for me lately- they are invaluable!

Hannah said...

Wow, so many wonderful things in the near future! The waiting time will be a lot shorter with all these things. So proud of you for running a half marathon - wow! I appreciate your posts so much! You and your husband are adorable in those photos in your last post!

Stacey said...

Awesome list, Becky! It will be fun watching you accomplish these things in your waiting time. It was a great time in my own marriage when we decided that we were going to keep living in the waiting. Traveling was our favorite thing by far! I can't wait to hear where you and John will be "honeymooning." :)
I love that you're celebrating your family of two! You'll be so glad you did when you get to enjoy your larger family one day.

Jennifer said...

Sounds like a great list. So sorry the wait time is going to be longer than expected, but it sounds like you have a lot to keep you busy. I have a hard time looking at it that way right now. I think maybe if I was younger I might feel that way...but almost being 39 is freaking me out a little. I'll just keep praying and I'll calm down.