Saturday, December 11, 2010

1st Care Package

When I followed up with our adoption agency about an update on Joshua, I also verified receipt of the care package we sent. I was informed that it had arrived and was being sent to Korea via DHL at the end of this past week. So hopefully it is on its way to Korea as I write this!

The care package had to fit in a 1 gallon size Ziploc bag. This is what I ended up sending:

soft blanket, knit hat, teether, 2 wrist rattles, soft photo 
album with pictures of us (and Annie), disposable camera

I bought two of the blankets so he will have a familiar object if the one we sent him doesn't come home with him. I also bought two of the photo albums. I will put pictures of his foster family in it for him to look at once he is home. I bought the hat at my church's craft bazaar; I think Joshua will look so cute in the yellow. I hope it fits him.

The coolest thing happened as I was picking out the teether. I should back up a bit though and explain that I was really scared of going out to buy items for this package. I haven't been to a baby section or Babies 'r' us in years. I have bought baby items for friends, but I have done so either online, at a Hallmark store (for a baby album), or at the base exchange (similar to a department store). I tried to go to the baby section at Target a couple of weeks before this outing and while I did manage to walk through it, I was too afraid to buy anything. However, I knew I had to push past these fears. I read something about faith in the Apples of Gold Bible study I recently took part in that stuck with me; faith is "seeing what God intends to do in a situation and acting in harmony with it." I couldn't wait until I stopped feeling afraid to start putting together a care package for Joshua. Even though there is no absolute guarantee in this adoption, I had to begin to act in harmony with what God had already shown me and what He had already brought about. I have no reason to doubt that we will bring Joshua home next year. So I decided to "do it afraid" (something I read in a Joyce Meyer book) and go shopping. As I was heading in to Toys 'r' us (one with a good sized baby section), I kept repeating to myself, "You have every right to be here." I felt like a fraud. I expected at any moment to be told I didn't belong and needed to leave. I know these feelings probably sound crazy, but I think they are fairly common to those who have dealt with infertility for many years. However, I pressed on and asked the Lord to give me strength to be able to do this and for His help and guidance. 

Then I began to look around the store, still feeling completely overwhelmed. I found a recordable book called "Guess How Much I Miss You" that a friend had told me about and put it in my basket (this book was the reason I went to Toys 'r' us in the first place). I started to look around some more and found a section with lots of teethers. I started to reach for one when a lady reached past me and grabbed a teether like the one above. I asked her if she thought it was a better one than the one I was going to get. She says, "Well, who are you buying it for?" I pause and then manage to tell her (stumbling) that it is for our son in Korea who we are adopting. "Oh," she says pointing to her 16 month old son, "he's adopted!" Of all the people in the store, I could have asked, I ended up asking another adoptive mom! It was as if the Lord had sent me an angel. She then preceded to take me around the story suggesting items that her son had liked. God is so good!!! After this I really felt emboldened to finish the task. I ended up buying the teether she suggested, the wrist rattles, and the photo album for this care package and the recordable book and some stackable cups she suggested for a future care package. I even ended up going to the baby section at Target, where I bought the blanket, and Babies 'r' us later that evening.

I am so thankful; the Lord truly is my "ever present help" (Psalm 46:1) in times of trouble. 


Niki said...

Well, I'm bawling here. I'm so happy you were able to buy some things for your son. You're right. You DO have every right to be there!! Praise the Lord for the lady he had there waiting to help you through this first task. (I know the panic attack walking by the baby section at Target well. For awhile I couldn't even go into Target at all.)

Just Believing said...

OK that totally made me cry :) I think that is such a wonderful care package and what a wonderful story! Thank you for sharing!

Lisa said...

Oh Becky I love the care package! You chose such perfect items. Now we pray he gets them quickly!! Also, it's so neat that God led the perfect person to you right when you needed her!!

Flakymn said...

Did you end up buying the reocrdable book. I think it is a FABULOUS idea. The boys have one from their grandparents here in Turkey and love it.

Every thought you wrote about brought back so many memories for me of when JB and I went to register for Isaac's birth. I hadn't been in to the baby section of Target in 5 years. How could I do this? How could I ask for one of those scanners. It was incredibly hard.

But somewhere in the middle of it, we started having fun. We started discussing everything and just enjoying the moment.

Adoption is different than a biological pregnancy, but what is the same is that God only assures us today. We don't know what tomorrow will bring. I didn't know if Isaac would coe home and I didn't know if Elijahw oudl come home, but I had to move ahead as if they would.

A said...

I love the care package contents!! :) That is so cool about the other adoptive mom in the store!

Rachel said...

I'm reading this with baby boy laying in my chest as I'm bawling my eyes out. Oh, Becky! Those are the feelings we all have. I'm constantly feeling like I'm going to be "found out"! And now with our adoption not finalized, I feel like I'm doing it afraid all day, everyday. Please enjoy this beautiful time as we are trying to enjoy him. Please know that we are praying for you today!!

Sandra said...

What a great encounter.

Stacey said...

Becky!!! I'm so happy to get caught up on your blog today. I'm sorry it has taken me this long. I just could not be happier to read all that has happened!

First of all, Joshua is beautiful. I had chills when I saw his picture and tears when I read about how you pray over it. Becky, you are always in my prayers anyway, but I will be specifically praying for you and your husband as you wait to go get your son. I can't imagine what that must be like, but I hope it goes by as quickly as possible. I can't wait to see your son in your arms! I know you are holding him in your heart until then.

I love the items you picked for the care package. Each one is special. I know it took a lot of courage for you to buy them, and how wonderful that the Lord provided encouragement for you.

Thinking of you, friend! I'll be better about staying up to date. Sending love and prayers.