Monday, March 22, 2010

"Bringing into Captivity Every Thought"

We had an interesting weekend - not quite what I had expected. I think the missionaries who stayed with us may have been expecting an older couple. I could really see how hard it is for missionaries, especially having to depend on others for financial support and how hard they work. But I know that ultimately they are depending on God, and He is completely trustworthy. I sensed that the couple that stayed with us may have been sad or discouraged in some way, but there was never an opening to talk with them about it. I felt very burdened to pray for them though. Friday night we had a fabulous dinner with a small group and then got to hear about what God is doing in Jamaica. Saturday they were gone most of the day, so I studied my Perspectives homework and John worked on his schoolwork. Saturday night we went to a potluck dinner at church where we heard a speaker from The Navigators. I had always wanted to know who and what the Navigators are so I enjoyed learning about their organization. Sunday was church and then they had to leave. John and I were able to have a date night on Sunday - we went to see Hurt Locker (really good, but not sure if it was really Best Picture material) and then ate Ethiopian (one of my favorites!).

We use to attend the church we now go to (and were even married there) when we lived in Maryland a few years ago (prior to us moving to Florida). Now that we are back, we are beginning to connect with old friends and acquaintances at church. I was able to reconnect with one of them Saturday night. She was always one of the most loving and kind people, and such an encouragement to me when John and I were geographically separated during my last year in the army. I had been hoping to reconnect with her, but at the same time, I was wondering how I would feel. When I left for Florida, she had 4 beautiful little boys. She has since had another little boy and just recently a little girl. The thing was when she told me, I felt genuine joy for her. But later that night when we left, it was hard not to let my thoughts get away from me, wondering why the Lord gives one person six children, and He won't even give us one. I know that thoughts like these are wrong, not to mention completely unhelpful. They only sow the seeds of bitterness and discontent. I try to make a point of refusing these thoughts, casting them down, because they are not truth. If the Lord gives someone a hundred children it doesn't take away even one bit His ability to build our family. To be honest I don't understand why we have no children yet. But I do trust that the Lord has a plan for our family.

"Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ." 2 Cor 10:5 (KJV)

Hope you all had a wonderful weekend!


Anonymous said...

Sounds like the missions conference was good. Yes, it really is hard not to compare and question God when other families have children so easily. I know it sounds illogical, but they almost seem selfish to have too many children, in my eyes. I guess we'll ask God one day in heaven. But then again, we have had chance to try fertility treatments and may have chance to adopt one day, while others from poorer countries may not have that chance if they were infertile?

Jennifer said...

He does have a plan for you. You are right...those bitter feelings are no good. Unfortunately, sometimes we all feel them. It's what you do with them that matters. Do you dwell on them and keep feeling that way or do you try to overcome them. I think you do the right thing.

I know God has something amazing planned for you! ((HUGS))

Hannah said...

Glad the conference went well, even though you didn't get a chance to talk with the missionary couple in depth. Maybe prayers is what they need most.

And I completely relate to wondering why we don't have children when so many of our friends do already. It's a question on my heart so often. I'm trying to just trust God too, and watch what he's going to do, but it can be so hard.
Hugs & prayers!

Lisa said...

I have never noticed that Bible verse before...I know I have read it, probably many times, but it popped out at me when I read it on your post just now!! Thanks for sharing that one, it will be a good one to commit to memory because those evil/jealous/questioning thoughts sure pop in my mind quite often through this journey. Thanks also for your prayers and encouraging comments always, but especially these last few days. They mean so much to me. You are also in my prayers!!!